z
zeldathemes

evaot:

when ur tryin to tell a story but people talk over you

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1 day ago on July 31st | J | 97,728 notes
ihaveabigcock-pit:

How much are we talking here

ihaveabigcock-pit:

How much are we talking here

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 526,001 notes

mj-scully:

laptopped:

do rude people know they’re rude

image

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 275,764 notes
squartmart:

sextspert:

superwholock-at-hogwarts:

chevvybar:

hiddlestalker:

lifehackable:

More Life Hacks Here

Day 1: you ripped open my vagina and I hate you
Day 5: just kidding you’re so cute and soft and small lol I could fit you in a handbag
Month 2: STOP CRYING PLEEEAASE. JUST ONE HOUR OF SLEEP AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVERRRR
Month 5: mama? Mama? Mama? Say it? Please? Say something? Please
Month 8: IF. YOU. DON’T. STOP. SAYING. MAMA. THE. POLICE. WILL. NEVER. FIND. THE. BODY.
Year 1: One down. 17 to go…
Year 1, Month 11: oh god.. it’s coming…
Year 2: NO PLEASE JUST PUT THAT DOWN. NNOOO! DON’T TOUCH THAT! Baby, i love you no matter whaT BUT PLEASE DON’T TOUCH THAT JJUST STAY STILL PLEASE SWEETHEART
Year 3: Oh thank god that’s over
Year 4: Awwww, you went to preschool. isn;t that adorable, my little intellectual shit
Year 5: ACTUAL SCHOOL! YOU LEARNED COLORS AND NUMBERS YOU’RE A GENIUS

Year 15: You called me a fuckwit. What the fuck is a fuckwit?

year 16; oh god no LIGHTLY step on the gas NO NON NO NO YOU DONT HAVE TO PRESS THAT HARD ON THE BREAK!!!

year 17: I caught you masturbating but you didn’t notice so I didn’t say anything. You’re welcome.

reading this makes me feel embarrassed

squartmart:

sextspert:

superwholock-at-hogwarts:

chevvybar:

hiddlestalker:

lifehackable:

More Life Hacks Here

Day 1: you ripped open my vagina and I hate you
Day 5: just kidding you’re so cute and soft and small lol I could fit you in a handbag
Month 2: STOP CRYING PLEEEAASE. JUST ONE HOUR OF SLEEP AND I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVERRRR
Month 5: mama? Mama? Mama? Say it? Please? Say something? Please
Month 8: IF. YOU. DON’T. STOP. SAYING. MAMA. THE. POLICE. WILL. NEVER. FIND. THE. BODY.
Year 1: One down. 17 to go…
Year 1, Month 11: oh god.. it’s coming…
Year 2: NO PLEASE JUST PUT THAT DOWN. NNOOO! DON’T TOUCH THAT! Baby, i love you no matter whaT BUT PLEASE DON’T TOUCH THAT JJUST STAY STILL PLEASE SWEETHEART
Year 3: Oh thank god that’s over
Year 4: Awwww, you went to preschool. isn;t that adorable, my little intellectual shit
Year 5: ACTUAL SCHOOL! YOU LEARNED COLORS AND NUMBERS YOU’RE A GENIUS

Year 15: You called me a fuckwit. What the fuck is a fuckwit?

year 16; oh god no LIGHTLY step on the gas NO NON NO NO YOU DONT HAVE TO PRESS THAT HARD ON THE BREAK!!!

year 17: I caught you masturbating but you didn’t notice so I didn’t say anything. You’re welcome.

reading this makes me feel embarrassed

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 64,558 notes
jisbonfandom:

The Mentalist Merchandise: http://bit.ly/L0HDHS

jisbonfandom:

The Mentalist Merchandise: http://bit.ly/L0HDHS

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 35 notes

sassiie14:

FEEEEEELS

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 162 notes
1 day ago on July 31st | J | 582 notes

25 Truly Useful Inventions That You Never Knew You Needed

californiadaydreaming:

beben-eleben:

Ironing Board Mirror

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The Rolling Bench That You Can Use After Rain

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Hour Glass LED Traffic Lights

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Universal Wrapping Paper

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Cup Holder Umbrella

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Toothpaste Tube Squeezer

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Baby Stroller and Scooter Hybrid

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Mirror Wiper

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Spaghetti Measuring Tool

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Rotating 360° Lego Sockets

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Read More

ARE THESE THINGS REAL?!?!

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 1,728 notes
1 day ago on July 31st | J | 304 notes

superb1a:

When you bullshit an essay and manage to get a good grade.image

1 day ago on July 31st | J | 251,753 notes